Dear Mr. Mamet,
I am very excited to hear about your new movie Joan Of Bark: The Dog That Saved France. I am a huge fan of your work. I really adore your films State And Main, The Winslow Boy, and The Spanish Prisoner. I was the producer and star of the first all dog version of Speed-The-Plow, in which I played the Madonna part. I am currently trying to mount an all dog version of Boston Marriage. I know you write terrific dialogue for animals because I was very impressed with the bear's monologue in The Edge, although I was disappointed there wasn't a real buffalo in American Buffalo, not to mention no major dog part in Wag The Dog.
However, I do suspect there is a dog role in Joan Of Bark and I think I would be the best dog for that role. I have starred in one feature already, as well as short films and music videos. I just won an award in the Best Pet Awards. Yes, I would make a perfect Joan. I'm also strong and can speak a little French. "Oui woof!!"
So have your people call my people. I am also a big fan of Rebecca Pidgeon, even though she is not a real pigeon.
Hugs and wiggles,
Lucky
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