dogs in distress

There are many peoples helping the dogs and other animals who were treated badly by the hurricane in New Orleans. One pack is called Noah's Wish but there are many more. I hope all the lost and confused dogs in the Large Easy are reunited with their peoples as soon as possible.

Huckleberry

I haven't posted in a while because there have been so many things happening. I have a new sister named Coco. Well, they tell me she's a sister. She's a little pink thing and doesn't do much. I sniffed her feet a few times, but for the most part, she's boring. I'm waiting for her to do something exciting. She makes noise and kicks. That's about it.

Also, I want to tell you about the greatest. trail. ever. It's Huckleberry in Pacific Spirit Park. I love this trail. If this trail were a cute boy dog, I would marry it. I dream about Huckleberry. It is so much fun to run on. There is a big knocked down tree that I try to climb and there is a stream to jump in even though I am always told "Don't go in there, Lucky!!!" I have now had Huckleberry taken away from me because I jumped in the stream after being told not to. I managed to walk away from the stream. I got across the bridge and was a good ten feet away, but then the stream called me back. It said "Come frolic in my cool, clear water" so I did. But I know this punishment won't last long and as soon as I can, I'll be back on Huckleberry. Maybe if I go lick my sister's feet again...

apples

Nothing says it's the dog days of summer like getting to play with apples. My new favourite thing is to take apples off the tree and huck them against walls and fences. Apples explode so much better and faster than sticks. If you throw a stick, then you have to run after it, fetch it, shake it around for a while, and after all that is done, you get to tear it apart. It's a long, drawn out ritual. With an apple, you can just swing your head, let it fly out of your mouth, and SMACK! It hits something and explodes. So far, I've only got to try this with apples from trees. I keep trying to take the apples from the sidewalk bins in front of stores, but everyone I know thwarts me in this experiment.

summer

I haven't posted to my Dog Blog for a while. I have been taking it easy. I was very busy for a long time promoting my movie. The benefit screening went very well. I even got to speak in the microphone in front of many peoples, just like I did at the Celluloid Social Club. Since then, I have been enjoying a very large bone that was a gift from my old roommates and I have been playing in the park a lot with Bailey, who doesn't pee on me anymore.

---

If a dog was the teacher you would learn stuff like:

When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.

Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.

Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure
ecstasy.

When it's in your best interest, practice obedience.

Let others know when they've invaded your territory.

Take naps.

Stretch before rising.

Run, romp, and play daily.

Thrive on attention and let people touch you.

Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.

On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass.

On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.

When
you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.

No matter how often you're scolded, don't buy into the guilt thing and pout...
run right back and make friends.

Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.

Eat with gusto and enthusiasm. Stop when you have had enough.

Be loyal. Never pretend to be something you're not.

If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.

When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by and nuzzle them
gently.

Urban Rush

Today I went on the Urban Rush talk show. This was my second talk show appearance. I had previously been on Global Television's breakfast show. There were other dogs in the studio with me. A very handsome (but shy) giant golden retriever named Barkley and a pretty doberman whose name I cannot remember. She was so quiet, I could barely hear her name when she told me. I was there to promote my movie Lucky Stars, and they were there to find their own peoples. They were both dogs up for adoption at the SPCA. They were doggies without homes. So sad. They seemed very nice so I hope they find homes soon. Also, there were bunnies! The Urban Rush people wouldn't let me play with the bunnies.

The hosts Mike and Fiona were very nice to me, but they teased Maureen a lot. I got to kiss Mike. Mostly I sat around and looked cute. They even mentioned my Dog Blog!!

Tonight I watched the season finale of Lost. They didn't show Vincent very much. He mostly tugged at his leash on the beach. Then I finished a bone. Now I'm off to bed to rest up for the big day tomorrow -- my fundraiser for the SPCA Biscuit Fund.

more me in the media

I got a mention in this week's Georgia Straight, saying I'll be greeting everyone at the Van East Cinema this Thursday, and I am supposed to be on the Urban Rush talk show tomorrow. If you're watching Urban Rush, look for the cute black labrador with the saucy glint in her eye.

this says it all

it's time for a new Littlest Hobo

So far, the esteemed David Mamet has not written me back. He doesn't know what he's missing. Peoples have been writing me all week since my appearance on Animal Planet the other day. I'm probably the only dog on that channel that hasn't had to study with Dr. Stanley Coren. I'm a professional. I don't need no stinkin' behaviour modification. Grrrr.

I have a new idea. I think TV should bring back The Littlest Hobo. I would be the bestest dog to appear in it. I can see it now "Starring Lucky as the Littlest Hobo". Not to take anything away from London. He was an amazing actor. And I know what peoples are thinking: "But Lucky, hobo is a German Shepherd and you're a Labrador." To that I say "phwooshch" and sigh really loudly. They're remaking The Honeymooners with Cedric The Entertainer in the Jackie Gleason role, right? They already remade Heaven Can Wait with Chris Rock. So why not remake The Littlest Hobo with a Labrador Retriever.

In the meantime, until that day happens, enjoy The Littlest Hobo theme in Spanish and Scottish, and check out my appearance in the new video for White Whale Records band kids these days.

An Open Letter to David Mamet

Dear Mr. Mamet,

I am very excited to hear about your new movie Joan Of Bark: The Dog That Saved France. I am a huge fan of your work. I really adore your films State And Main, The Winslow Boy, and The Spanish Prisoner. I was the producer and star of the first all dog version of Speed-The-Plow, in which I played the Madonna part. I am currently trying to mount an all dog version of Boston Marriage. I know you write terrific dialogue for animals because I was very impressed with the bear's monologue in The Edge, although I was disappointed there wasn't a real buffalo in American Buffalo, not to mention no major dog part in Wag The Dog.

However, I do suspect there is a dog role in Joan Of Bark and I think I would be the best dog for that role. I have starred in one feature already, as well as short films and music videos. I just won an award in the Best Pet Awards. Yes, I would make a perfect Joan. I'm also strong and can speak a little French. "Oui woof!!"

So have your people call my people. I am also a big fan of Rebecca Pidgeon, even though she is not a real pigeon.

Hugs and wiggles,
Lucky

newspaper

I am all alone today. Everyone went off to a wedding. I have had some peoples here to take me for walks, but mostly it is a day to get some bone chewing done. I am working on a really tasty bone right now. I was in the newspaper again today. I have now been in the newspaper at least three times. Usually I am in the gossip column, but today I am in the entertainment section. However, the writer said I was a BOY!! I am a young lady, thank you very much. Some would even say I'm a bitch. Well, if anyone ever calls me a boy again, I'll show you bitch.

Okay, I'm kidding. I love the press. You can call me whatever you want, just don't call me late for dinner. NEVER call a labrador late for dinner.

Thank you, and I now return you to your regularly scheduled adorable Lucky. You may commence rubbing my belly.

Celluloid Social Club

Tonight I went to the Celluloid Social Club at the Anza to promote the SPCA benefit screening of my movie Lucky Stars. This was a big deal for me because I was banned from the Anza for a while because of my drunken table dancing incident. Peoples still speak of this incident. Some even started calling me Lucky Lohan. I tried to blame it on Bailey (Nick's dog) but truth be told, Bailey wasn't even there. He's usually a good scapedog. But I wasn't drunk.

You see, I was trying to stand up to see the movie they were showing and I knocked over the table. That made me kind of skittish (as it would any dog) so I jumped on to a nearby table and spilled some beer, which got all over my fur, so I smelled like I was drunk.

However, tonight I redeemed myself. I only barked a couple times and I watched all the movies! I really liked the commercials and trailers they played because they were short and had lots of movement. I am very proud of my patience tonight. I am not so proud of my unelegant approach to the front of the room to greet my audience. I tried to jump onstage and missed... in front of about 150 peoples. No one laughed, but I knew I looked silly. Then I licked the microphone a lot as they took my picture. I put out the word to find me some scripts to direct and some peoples came up to me after and talked story. I liked one script about a squirrel that a guy told me about, although I think the squirrel should get caught by a dog at the end of the story.

More Animal Planet

Animal Planet called yesterday to tell me that my profile segment is one of the highlights of the awards show. They thought it would lead to me getting lots of scripts and offers to act! (Little do they know that now I want to direct -- yes, you heard it here first: I want to be the first canine director!)

Be sure to tune in to Animal Planet on May 17th for the 3rd Annual Iams Pet Awards.

Animal Planet Iams Pet Awards

I have big news!!! I am nominated for best pet in Canada in the upcoming Animal Planet Iams Pet Awards. I was interviewed today for the show. I had to sit still for a long interview about how I got into acting and what my goals are for my career. Then they videotaped me watching TV and playing with a ball in my courtyard. I licked the camera lens a lot. I also kissed the camera man many times. I hope that will help me win. I am up against a cat that can play fetch and some foxes, among other really talented pets. Yay for Lucky!!

You can see me on TV (again) on Animal Planet, May 17th. The awards show will repeat on CTV and Discovery Channel on a later date.

Dogster

Be my friend on Dogster.

I want to do art

The elephant on the left is named Lucky. She is a famous painter. Her paintings sell for thousands of dollars. I feel a bond with her. We're both artists named Lucky. And we're both really cute.

music video

Yesterday, I acted in a video for the band kids these days. They have three songs in my movie, and they also have a song on the TV show "life as you know it" featuring Kelly Osbourne. I had a small but significant role. I played the dog.

Why am I always typecast? I can do other parts. I don't have to always play the dog.

My Sidekick was hacked

I have had a bad week. When peoples have a bad week, they say it's "crappy" -- but for a dog, a crappy week is a good week, full of great smells. So for me, it has been a decidedly uncrappy week. Which is bad.

First of all: I did not get the Pedigree commercial. It seems peoples near and dear to me KNEW I did not get a callback, but they hid this information from me. I had to hear this news from Sam and Chelsea, who also didn't get callbacks. But at least their peoples broke the bad news to them. For the record, peoples: dogs don't like living in denial.

Ha ha! What am I saying? Dogs love denial.



Then things got worse. Some peoples on the internets hacked my Sidekick and posted incriminating photos of me all over web pages somewhere. And they gave out all of my valuable phone numbers. Pranksters from the internets are constantly calling Three Dog Bakery and Lindsay Lohan, and it's all my fault. Well, Three Dog Bakery quite likes it. So if you call them, please order me some more Lab Licks. They're yummy.

Happy Valentine's Day!!

How many dogs does it take to change a lightbulb?

1. Golden Retriever:
The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned out bulb?

2. Border Collie:
Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.

3. Dachshund:
You know I can't reach that stupid lamp!

4. Rottweiler:
Make me.

5. Boxer:
Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark.

6. Lab:
Oh, me, me!!!!! Pleeeeeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeeeze, please, please, please!

7. German Shepherd:
I'll change it as soon as I've led these people from the dark, check to make sure I haven't missed any, and make just one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the situation.

8. Jack Russell Terrier:
I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture.

9. Old English Sheep Dog:
Light bulb? I'm sorry, but I don't see a light bulb?

10. Cocker Spaniel:
Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.

11. Chihuahua:
Yo quiero Taco Bulb.

12. Pointer:
I see it, there it is, there it is, right there ...

13. Greyhound:
It isn't moving. Who cares?

14. New Zealand Sheep Dog:
First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle...

15. Poodle:
I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.

Pedigree part deux

I did super well at my audition. I gave out lots of kisses. Everyone loves Lucky kisses. They are cherished and much appreciated. The casting director asked me to walk across the room, which I did, although I was momentarily distracted by all the wonderful smells there. They even held up a DVD of my movie Lucky Stars for the audition camera.

I heard my friends Sam and Chelsea went in for their auditions today. Sam acted with me in my film. He's like a canine Alec Baldwin. He's a big guy, but handsome, and generous to his co-stars. It would be super awesome if he and I both got casted in the commercial so we could act together again. And Chelsea could come along, too, to be our biscuit carrier.

Pedigree

I am nervous. I am auditioning for a Pedigree commercial tomorrow. I haven't been on TV since October. I kind of let myself go over Christmas. I had to much bacon. My butt is... not... as... small... as... it...

used...

to...

be...

But it still smells damn good!

a request from Lucky

Nominate me for best pet in Canada!

Why? Because I'm smart and cute and I have the softest tummy. And I'm almost young enough to play in the Puppy Bowl.

A prayer from a dog

I didn't make this up. A friendly Rottweiler told me it at Dog Beach other day. (Yes, there are some friendly Rottweilers, don't be a bigot!)

TO GOD - FROM THE DOG:

Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another?

Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story?

Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog? How often do you see a jaguar riding around? We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the "Chrysler Eagle" the "Chrysler Beagle"?

Dear God: If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is she still a bad dog?

Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?

Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good dog:
1. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.
2. The sofa is not a 'face towel'
3. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.
4. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.
5. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying "hello"
6. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table.
7. I must shake the rain water out of my fur before entering the house - not after.
8. I will not throw up in the car.
9. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt.
10. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch when we have company.

I want one of these

Coming really, really soon: a cel phone for dogs!

Happy Woof Year

Christmas means I get to eat steak. I like steak, but it seems to upset my tummy. I also love swimming, even though swallowing sea water also upsets my tummy. In fact, pretty much everything other than organic dog food and gourmet cookies upsets my tummy, but I still want to eat everything. I know Sammy and Chelsea will bug me to eat their raw meat diet. They eat raw food and take vitamins, but vitamins are gross! I like eating cookies. And besides, when my tummy is upset, I listen to my dogtor and eat grass, which cures almost everything. It's cold out right now, so the grass has frost on it, making it even more yummy and better to cure sick tummies.